The time is getting closer for the big move! It’s exciting but the stress has hit us both. The communication died a long time ago but now is the time we should be sharing each other’s feelings, but we’re not.
Are these alarm bells or the alarm bells I should be paying attention too?
But I’m so excited. We have apartment viewings set up I have even decided to take a 6-month break and not work! And the reason for this is my ultimate goal is to help people and what else but to become an English teacher! I suppose writing these entries should help them a little too. Help with the vocabulary and structure and all that?!
I am so so so so happy with this decision!
He also seems to be supportive and probably more thankful that I have a plan and I won’t be out of a job and sit at home all the while! Eating more cake and more ice cream.
The positives are outweighing the negatives BUT as an Indian woman, so much pressure has been put on us to put others first.
It’s about what we look like, who we are with, how we behave and the most important thing what we wear hahahaha! OK a slight exaggeration. I shouldn’t laugh but looking back, I have come so far not to let this get in my way anymore. There were obvious differences in the upbringing between us and just a general difference in opinion. But all people are different. There is no right or wrong way to do things.
My situation will not even be close to some experiences people have been through but if we stay strong, we can do this! And just reading somebody else’s experiences can help a lot and make you feel motivated to take that one step further forward and maybe accomplish what you have always wanted.
I have always been encouraged and supported to follow what my passions are and now, my passion is helping others with teaching them ways to better their future, teaching them English.
Anyway I have digressed as usual.
So, we are getting ready to go with maybe a few weeks left BUT there are some underlying issues that have now been projected onto each other. The differences in behaviour, outlooks and trying to be “independent”. A matrimony is supposed to develop and grow together – in the same direction but we’re so far apart.
It was the first time he EVER shouted at me and also threatened to take me home, back to my parents’ house. We eventually knew we weren’t like each other and we had a different viewpoint on life which is why living around friends and family is so much easier as they keep you grounded. There is always somebody watching and there is always somebody who knows somebody and there is always “do your parents know?”
So I said ok take me, being the stubborn shit that I am and so he turned off the motorway
I screamed NO!! DONT!! Crying
And so, we went back home….
Miss UKIndia in Barcelona 